How many times have you been sitting in a bar or nightclub and a woman is showing you all kinds of signs that she’s interested, but then she moves back as soon as you try to game her she? And then, as soon as you step back, she comes on aggressively, dropping obvious hints and signs again.
“What the hell!” you scream in your head. “Does she want to hook up or what? Is this girl feeling me or playing games?”
Figuring out women is a hassle. Even when you start learning about pickup and the art of seduction, the learning curve is huge if you go it on your own. It was already enough for you to work up the guts and get out there to overcome your “handicap,” and now it’s as if you’re playing some kind of strategy game, but aren’t even sure where to start.
That’s why bootcamps are the best way to overcome your challenges with women. You have experienced coaches out there with you in the field who have seen and done it all. It helps you bridge the gap between reading about this stuff in a book and the reality of human interaction.
It helps you work through your nerves and inexperience to seal the deal.
Case in Point: The Businessman
Lately, people have been sending in emails asking about what happens in our bootcamps, so we asked The Businessman — one of the students from our bootcamp in Cape Town, South Africa this year — if we could relay the story of his experiences.
Let’s talk about how The Businessman progressed at an event.
As you probably know, we start out our sessions with a crash course that covers a wide range of techniques and theories. We go over pre-opening, opening, number closing, negs – and much more.
Some people, The Businessman included, find this first session a little challenging because the things we teach are often counter-intuitive to what most men think they know about seduction.
But this first day is an essential part of the whole experience and sets the stage for the magic that happens later.
So, Day 1 the Businessman put in his dues and walked away slightly skeptical, but like any good student he gave it the benefit of the doubt.
The Businessman had a bit of a learning curve starting out. As we moved on, Amanda, who is always a huge help by bringing a unique female perspective to bootcamp sessions, pointed out that his approach was right on, but that he might have been a little too strong at first and intimidating some of his targets.
She gave him some tips on how to start out a little lighter and then work in natural kino to gently escalate the situation. She also pushed him to go back for phone numbers even after only brief interactions. It’s all a learning experience, so it’s crucial to capitalize on every chance encounter for both learning and the opportunity to take it further.
After all, a warm lead is better than no lead at all.
And one of the things we loved about The Businessman was that he ate up everything – all the great advice, even if it seemed counter-intuitive – and put it into action.
Right away, from Day 1, he started getting phone numbers even from women Amanda pushed him back to interact with when he thought there was no chance in hell he would get their digits.
“[Amanda] said I need to push myself more; direct the interaction in the way YOU want it to go! You the man, take control, take initiative and make things happen in YOUR time!”
And so he did.
Another thing The Businessman struggled with was getting socially involved in a club environment without drinking at all. And it’s true that this is a huge challenge for most people, but it’s a crucial skill to learn.
Despite the challenge, he opened 10 sets that first night without a drop of liquor.
You could really sense his energy when he wrote early on: “This weekend I intend on working very hard to raise my energies in my sober state and develop a true profound confidence when in a club so that when I am under the influence I will flourish 10 times more; I will be unstoppable!”
A lot of you are probably cringing a little bit at the thought of going into clubs stone cold sober and trying to muster the confidence to approach women.
Listen, it’s important to remember that a bootcamp is not an “end result.”
Bootcamps are really an experiment – as should every night that you go out, until you’ve mastered these techniques. It’s an experiment in living a better life, and when you approach it with that mindset, you realize that you have nothing to lose and EVERYTHING to gain!
So just go out there, give it your all — open without hesitation, incorporate the techniques you’re learning and you will see spectacular results!
We live once. This is your chance to start living your youth to the fullest – take full advantage, maximize your opportunities, and go for what you want.
Because you are worthy of whatever it is that you want!
A bootcamp is a once in a lifetime opportunity to go out in the field with the best in the world. If you ever do something like this, take advantage and dive into the deep-end, fearlessly knowing that you are guided through the process and that everything you need to know is already within you!
That’s what this guy did.
By Day 2, The Businessman was embracing this kind of attitude and beaming with confidence. He felt like he really connected with Adam’s lessons after getting a chance to test out his skepticism the night before.
“Adam’s genius formula just sunk into my brain and resonated with me like a 12 piece orchestra in a massive reverberated hall,” he wrote. “It all just made perfect sense; there wasn’t one bit of skepticism; the formula is flawless in its purest form.”
That day, we exposed him to some of the exercises we’ve developed for creating rapport and responding to women, as well as sexual escalation. He mentally compared it to his previous behavior, trying to figure out where he might have been going wrong.
This is a great approach to learning new habits, by the way.
This was The Businessman’s last night on the town (for our bootcamp, anyway), and he got out there charging from the get-go, approaching groups of multiple people that included both men and women.
Not only that, but when he messed up, he didn’t dwell on it and let it get him down. He analyzed the situation in a healthy manner and kept having a great time.
At one point, The Businessman writes: “Right there and then I knew I hadn’t created enough rapport before breaking it. Clearly aware of my error, I moved onto a two set of beautiful girls, a brunette and a blondie, sure as hell not to make that same mistake again!”
You couldn’t help but love his attitude and the way he was developing.
And then Cary gave him a piece of counter-intuitive advice that rocked his world: “I then spoke to Cary who gave me a crucial piece of advice,” says The Businessman. “Once you’ve opened, do not leave your target! Stick to them like glue! It’s a common error that most guys make!”
He took the lesson he learned from that particular interaction and made the most of it.
“While speaking to Amanda, I see a girl dancing on her own shaking her booty while holding eye contact with me. Usually I would question, assess, doubt and find it awkward but after my convo with Amanda today about eye-fucking, I knew this was an outright invitation for an opener.”
From there, he capitalized and while he and that girl played a cat and mouse game for a bit of the night, he paid attention to the signs she was giving him, used some of his new techniques (as well as drops of advice and guidance from the coaches), and it just kept working like a charm. At one point, he recalls, “Didn’t need to use the isolation methods I learned today because SHE isolated me and pulled me to the couches.”
You’ve got to love it when that happens.
The night just kept getting better for The Businessman as he realized he had a “sexual demon” on his hands. LOL You can’t make this stuff up. Before he knew it, he had her outside for some “fresh air” and then on to having a discussion about sex with this woman he just met!
Imagine his surprise when she started telling him about having a threesome, having sex in a closet, and having sex on her mom’s bed (while her mom was in the house). I think we can all see where this is going…
She showed a little doubt on the way out the door, but The Businessman kept playing it cool. “’I’m not forcing you to leave; you can stay if you want. I’m gonna go though.’ ‘Why?’ in the puppy voice. ‘Coz this place is dying down!’ And I turned my back and exited. ‘K I’m coming with’ she uttered as she followed me like a little puppy.”
The Businessman felt like he was on fire, and he had every reason to because he was doing great. In the taxi, his “date” tested him a little bit and grilled him about why guys always wanted her for sex, but he kept playing it like a champ, assuring he wasn’t interested in sex and teasing her by flipping the script and saying HE didn’t do one night stands.
As you can imagine, he was getting a little worried at this point, but that’s okay. The important part was he didn’t show it and he kept using the material we’d been working on – he kept trying to see the night’s chain of events from his new perspective.
The Businessman then wrote about how he got this girl back to his place and things started getting heavier – some foreplay and making out in his bedroom. We could really see this guy had been listening in class when he wrote what he told the girl while they were fondling each other in his room: “A lot of girl girls aren’t good with foreplay; I hope you’re not one of them.”
Is it any wonder this guy was making such good progress?
This little line led her to qualify herself, and the next thing he knew she was making her way down his stomach to give him a blowjob to prove how “good” she was! You have to love it!
But her cold feet weren’t completely gone yet. She stopped herself before The Businessman got what he wanted and insisted she wasn’t that type of girl.
He knew it wasn’t over yet though…“It’s ok,” he said. “No-one’s forcing you.” Indeed.
He had the right words, but he was a bit frustrated. Nothing like blue balls to make a bad end to a great night… So, what did The Businessman do? He was stumped – what could he do…?
He turned to his network.
“I lay flat on the bed turned away from her, opened my laptop and BBMed my wingman about ASD. He advised me to ruin the mood and turn the lights on waiting for her to come to me.”
Please note that The Businessman was fortunate enough to have a great friend he could turn to who was more advanced at pickup than he was. This is one of the reasons we always encourage our students to hang out with people who are better with women than they are, whether they are naturals or other students.
And bootcamps are a great place to meet like-minded people like this.
This kind of thing really is priceless! Imagine having someone you can call any time you need a pointer and, like The Businessman, having the balls to use this great resource in the middle of a hookup.
So, he took his friend’s great advice and gave this woman the cold shoulder… and then The Businessman got his blowjob.
“It took her about 10 mins to join me on the bed craving a connection again as I was completely ignoring her like a puppy wanting some love. I went in for a second attempt and we started kissing. She moved down my stomach […]”
And he went on to have sex with this woman, who he had just met, in multiple different positions for about 45 minutes. And then he called her a cab.
Not too shabby if I do say myself…and remember, this guy was STONE COLD SOBER!
Listen, this mindset stuff and all these techniques we teach aren’t just some “feel-good” things we write about to impress our readers. This stuff has worked time and time again turning guys who are out there frustrated with life (and barely feeling like men at all) into giants!
It’s not rocket science, but if you didn’t figure this stuff out growing up and no one handed you the reigns, it does take some guidance. And more than anything, it took a quality that The Businessman has in droves – the willingness to go out on a limb to get out there and try.
It’s not easy, but if you do just like he did and put in the effort, you WILL improve.
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