Emotional Opposites Attract

It’s something we hear over and over again, “Opposites attract.”  Nothing can be more frustrating than when an emotionally giving types pairs up with a reserved type. Psychologists say we look for our opposites in partners to fill in the experiences we lack in our lives.

communicate your needs

In the psychology field, these different ways of relating are called “attachment style,” and they are partly learned and partly genetic. Amir Levine, a psychiatrist and neuroscientist at Columbia University in New York, identifies three types of attachment styles: Secure, Anxious and Avoidant. Secure people make up over half the population and are typically comfortable with intimacy.

Those with an Anxious attachment style, about 20% of the population, often worry about their relationship and whether their partner loves them. They typically are emotionally giving and love to show and receive affection. Those with an Avoidant attachment style, about 25% of the population, may love deeply, but they are uncomfortable showing it. Often, they rely on their partner to initiate a display of affection. Sometimes, they don’t even enjoy receiving expressions of love and may tend to minimize closeness with others.

So giving types are initially attracted to reserved types and vice versa because they are so different.  Givers find reserved partners intriguing and want to draw affection from someone who doesn’t show it easily and reserved types often want to be drawn out of their shells.  Over time though these two types can develop relationship problems.  The giver can start to seem needy so the reserved partner reacts by distancing themselves which makes the giver give more in an effort to gain back the affection.

The good news is that attachment style can change. Whether you and your partner are opposites or not as long as you both can communicate your needs and wants the relationship can flourish. Experts say couples need to tell each other what they want and be specific!

Read more here
To get more dating advice, check out my 6-video DVD training series and book called Street Seduce. This program sells for $47, but right now it’s available to you as a complimentary digital download when you join my website! It contains the core building blocks of my entire approach to becoming exceedingly effective at making it with the opposite sex. Don’t miss this! Just enter your email address so I know exactly where to send the entire Street Seduce training package to you right away with my compliments.

Men lose their minds speaking to attractive women.

Researchers who carried out this study, published in the journal of Experimental and Social Psychology, found

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that men who spend just a few minutes talking to an attractive woman performed less well in tests that measure

brain functioning than those who talked to unattractive women.

Researchers believe the reason for this may be that men use so much brain power for ‘cognitive resources’ (trying to impress) that they have little left for other tasks, like memory. This may be because evolutionarily men are programmed to think more about mating opportunities than women.

The study was begun after a psychologist at Radboud University was trying so hard to impress a woman that he forgot his own address. Wanting to know the reason for this phenomenon, forty male heterosexual volunteers were gathered for the study. Each volunteer performed a standard memory test to get a base score. They then spent several minutes chatting with female researchers and took another memory test. The results showed that the men were slower and less accurate after trying to impress the women, the more attracted they were to a woman the worse their score became.

When the same experiment was repeated with female volunteers the scores remained the same whether they were talking to attractive men or women.

The conclusion is that men are programmed to think about ways to pass on their genes!

See more of the article here.

To get more dating advice, check out my 6-video DVD training series and book called Street Seduce. This program sells for $47, but right now it’s available to you as a complimentary digital download when you join my website! It contains the core building blocks of my entire approach to becoming exceedingly effective at making it with the opposite sex. Don’t miss this! Just enter your email address so I know exactly where to send the entire Street Seduce training package to you right away with my compliments.

Tips for Looking Great Naked

It can be nerve wracking getting naked in front of someone for the first time especially when we tend to focus on all the things we think are wrong with our bodies.  Instead, think about the feature you like most and begin to appreciate your nakedness!  Here are a few tips on how to look your best when getting naked in front of that special someone.Feel good naked!

1) Exercise  can not only help you get to a more comfortable size but it can also increase your flexibility, stamina, and confidence level.  In addition to toning your muscles and skin , exercise will help your posture.  Naked or not, good posture is attractive.

2) Take care of your skin, it covers your entire body!  Of course there are the normal routines: exfoliating dead skin cells , shaving and waxing any unflattering hair, and moisturizing (men too!); but also think about taking a daily vitamin and fish oil supplement. Vitamins and minerals contain vital nutrients that contribute to healthy skin cells and hair cells, and fish oil works wonders on dry skin and membranes.

3) Style your hair, it’s the only thing you’ll be wearing in the buff!! Make sure to get a cut that suits the shape of your face and more importantly your personality.  Keep it free of tangles and try not to use anything sticky in your hair so it will be touch-ably soft.

4) Proper Hygiene is a big one! Be careful to trim and shape jagged nails, you don’t want to scratch or poke anyone while you’re being intimate.  Also beware of any strong smells that might be lingering on your hands, like garlic or onions and be sure to wash them off.  Of course check your breath and teeth for stains and stuck foods.

5) Scent plays a major role in the attraction process so make sure you smell delicious.  However DO NOT over power others with too much fragrance or use too many different smelling products (shampoo, deodorant, soap, and lotion) on your body.  Choose a single scent to use for your products or unscented products with a small amount of perfume or cologne.  Remember you want someone within two feet before they catch your scent so they’ll want to get closer for more.

6) Adjust the lighting if you can. No one looks good in bright fluorescent light. Try installing soft lamp lighting or sitting by the fire or candle light.  This will greatly improve the setting and mood.

7) Adjust the room temperature before hand.  Remember you want to be comfortable naked not shivering under a blanket or sweating profusely.

8) Finally just feel good about being naked!  Practice if you have to, to get this one down.  Cook or clean in the nude to get use to the feeling.  Try going to a naked yoga class or sunning in the backyard.  Get a massage or go to a nude bath house.  Just remember no one’s body is perfect!
To get more dating advice, check out my 6-video DVD training series and book called Street Seduce. This program sells for $47, but right now it’s available to you as a complimentary digital download when you join my website! It contains the core building blocks of my entire approach to becoming exceedingly effective at making it with the opposite sex. Don’t miss this! Just enter your email address so I know exactly where to send the entire Street Seduce training package to you right away with my compliments.

6 Holiday Date Ideas

The holidays can be a stressful time of year with so much pressure to get shopping done, to visit with family, or throw a party.  These can easily take a toll on our relationships or prevent us from beginning new ones.

Ice Skating Couple

So here are a few unique date ideas you can do with your sugarplum this time of year:

1) Looking at lights: This is an easy and fun date idea. You can walk hand in hand or drive around town looking at the decorations on houses and storefronts. You can even make a game of scoring the festive displays and if you want to get really into the holiday spirit leave a small gift at the winning house!

2) Holiday Brunch or Tea Service: Around the holidays many tea houses and some fancy hotels offer an old fashioned tea service with mounds of ridiculously tasty pastries, sandwiches, and an array of teas. You often have to make reservations but its worth sitting around guzzling tea by a fire and eating decadent treats while being waited on hand and foot.

3) Bath House: This wouldn’t be a great choice for a first date but for couples who get tired of the cold cloudy months of winter and fried from the hectic pace of the holidays, bath houses are a great retreat to go relax in a hot tub with your sweetie and let the stress melt away.

4) Baking: Ok so you’re aren’t the best in the kitchen, but it is a great holiday date idea and it’s an activity that you can do together.  Find a recipe, cookies are a really easy first foray into the baking scene. If you’re really unsure about baking from scratch you can always just grab pre-made dough and focus on decorating the cookies together with a ton of sprinkles! Besides who doesn’t like baked goods?

5) Outdoor activities: If you’re in an area that has a lot of snow you have ample choices here. There’s always, snowman building, snowball fights, sledding, snowshoeing, skiing, or ice skating. If you’re looking at a snow-less holiday season, don’t despair most cities have indoor ice skating and there is always hiking.

6) Decorating: There are lots of fun date ideas you can do with this one. Decorating the tree is by far the Christmas favorite but you can always decorate your pets and shame them by commemorating the event with a picture. You can also decorate wreaths, and cut out snowflakes (check out some great Star Wars snowflakes designs here)

Whatever you decide to do together, enjoy it! Happy Holidays!
To get more dating advice, check out my 6-video DVD training series and book called Street Seduce. This program sells for $47, but right now it’s available to you as a complimentary digital download when you join my website! It contains the core building blocks of my entire approach to becoming exceedingly effective at making it with the opposite sex. Don’t miss this! Just enter your email address so I know exactly where to send the entire Street Seduce training package to you right away with my compliments.

Can A Player Be Chivalrous?

Remember before you found out that there was sort of a whole underworld of guys online learning about how to pickup women… back when you were an AFC who had no idea what the hell to do to get results?

Remember how you used to act around women… catering to their every move, supplicating everything they said, and jumping to attention whenever possible?

You’ve probably come to realize that this sucking up gets you nowhere, and being the kind of guy that women like takes being a bit of a ball-buster. But that’s not entirely right either. What you need to realize about being a ball-buster is that you still need to be a gentleman. In fact, let’s just call it the cocky gentleman persona.

Exactly what do I mean by this?

I saying that just because we’re moving beyond this limited mindset that so many men have towards women — mindset where they’ll do anything to get a woman to speak to them or spend time with them — doesn’t mean you should lose your manners. In fact, being a smart-ass guy while also taking the time to pull out chairs and open doors really creates an intoxicating effect for women.

Do I need to remind you about the word “balance?”

EVERYTHING in game — or everything in the real world, I should say — is about balance. While that means you aren’t chasing her around and catering to her every whim, you aren’t beyond treating her like a lady either.

I think old fashioned manners like opening doors for women, giving them your coat when they’re cold, and escorting them home still go a long way, if for no other reason than because guys just don’t do these things any more. In many ways, I don’t blame them. I think a lot of guys are just too afraid that women won’t like it — but that’s why women do like it! It’s rare that men do these things for them.

And it’s ESPECIALLY rare for men to do it in a way that shows they aren’t trying to achieve something when they open a door, give a woman a hard time and flash a sly grin at the same time.

Just don’t start hovering over women expecting some kind of reward for doing something nice for them. In fact, it should be clear that you’re NOT actually doing it just for them — it’s simply a part of your nature… part of your belief about what a man should do.

Subtlety makes a world of difference between being a suck-up and being a player with some manners.

How Bad Is Your Negativity Hurting Your Game?

Sometimes we beat ourselves up so badly and expect so much that we really hurt ourselves much more than necessary. Do you know what I’m talking about? We expect perfect results every time just because we’ve gotten a little better at game, and consequently we throw ourselves off even more.

Let me give you an example.

One time, back when I had just started learning game and having some pretty decent successes, I went out sarging alone. The difference was that I’d almost convinced myself that I absolutely had to go home with a woman that night. I was thinking it in my mind, and, on a subconscious level, that was success for me.

Notice how this kind of mentality makes you outcome-dependent. You’re so focused on bringing a woman home that working towards that goal going to be the gist of your night. And if things don’t go in your favor, you’re going to feel let down. Some guys do this to themselves with the best of intentions. They’ll go out with a positive affirmation in their mind –“I’m taking someone home tonight” — convinced that positive thinking is what they need. Then, at the end of the night, they end up wondering what was wrong with them.

And that’s what happened to me. I had a good night. I met a few girls. I even met some cool guy who was sarging with me without even realizing what he was doing — a real natural. But at the end of the night, that guy had gone home and so had every girl I’d connected with. I tried meeting some more women, but none of them were really responding to me — probably because I was the creepy drunk guy standing in the bar not talking to anyone but girls. LOL I was still sitting at the bar stuck on this outcome and wondering what had gone wrong.

The ridiculous part was that I was actually angry! I was angry with myself, angry at a couple of women who had been rude to me, and just all around discouraged, defeated, and wondering what was wrong with me. Finally, I realized it was time to go home.

As I was lying down to go to sleep that night, it hit me. I was being a complete idiot! Why? I had actually walked out of that bar with three phone numbers! I know, I know! There I was all pissed off, and meanwhile I had number closed three women. My problem was that I’d just set my outcome expectation too high. If I hadn’t done that I probably would have gotten more numbers, but I was more than likely acting like a jerk because I was so focused on getting laid.

After giving myself this little reality check, I kind of sat back and said, “Wow, you’re really being a jackass. Go to sleep.” And I fell asleep with a smile on my face because I knew the end result of a “bad” night had been a valuable lesson learned. And you know what? I spoke to one of the girls the next day on the phone and she immediately started emailing me right afterward. Two of the other girls were flakes that didn’t answer their phones, but then one of those flakes called me a few days later out of the blue.

There are obviously two lessons to be learned here.

First, the worst thing that you can do when women aren’t responding well to you is get negative. Negativity grows and evolves, and people can almost smell it on you. Don’t ever take anything personally with women because if there’s one thing that I’ve learned through pickup it’s that taking things personally is the number one way to fail, no matter what angle you look at it from. That’s one of the reasons we call it game — so we don’t take so seriously. Think of every moment as a learning experience and sit down for a second in a quiet corner or when you get back home and think. Ask yourself, if there something you might have done differently that would have produced a different outcome. If the answer is yes, adjust. If not, move on.

The other lesson, of course, is never be outcome-dependent. Go out, enjoy yourself and take every step in the process as it comes. Are there guys who can go out every night and bring women home? Sure. And maybe someday you’ll be that guy, but not overnight or because you want to, but because you’ve put in the effort to learn how.

3 Easy Ways to Meet LOTS of Girls Before Valentine’s Day!

Over the next few weeks, we’re going to be releasing videos with top tips and advice to ensure you aren’t alone this Valentine’s Day. This video breaks down 3 different ways you can go about increasing the amount of the opposite sex in your life that you could be dating. From Cragislist to the Gym to Direct Game, this video is packed with simple tips to ensure you get a date for this upcoming Valentine’s Day!

And if you haven’t watched the new Understand Attraction video, then click here to watch it. You’re going to learn exact steps and specific breakdowns of how to be more successful at attracting and dating. You will get to see how one guy was able to achieve this in just 48 hours, without being handsome or having money. In fact you’re going to see how he went from being very unsuccessful with women to being able to make out with a cute girl he met just 5 minutes before, and he got these skills within just 48 hours!

How Not to Be Alone This Valentine’s Day!

And if you haven’t watched the new Understand Attraction video, then click here to watch it. You’re going to learn exact steps and specific breakdowns of how to be more successful at attracting and dating. You will get to see how one guy was able to achieve this in just 48 hours, without being handsome or having money. In fact you’re going to see how he went from being very unsuccessful with women to being able to make out with a cute girl he met just 5 minutes before, and he got these skills within just 48 hours!

Demonstrations to Help You Pick Up Chicks!

I just spent 3 hours doing demos for a student to help him improve after he told me that he’s a visual learner and begged me to train him a different way. There were minimal signs of improvement when he just watched, compared to what we normally do in training. Afterwards, another student took 3 hours of normal training doing the practice and gaining feedback. He got 4 girls numbers and went on a date with another.

Watching demos doesn’t get you results. You’re only going to see results if you go out there and practice. We put up this video just to illustrate what we mean.

Go out and practice!!!