You’ve probably noticed that some guys out there just have the ability to attract not only women but male friends into their lives with ease and are a catalyst in every social situation. Indeed, it often seems the world revolves around these types of men. Leadership is one of those things that many insecure guys just feel you either have or you don’t.
But much like attracting women, becoming a leader is something you can purposely get better at. It’s not something you can change over night because your lack of leadership is a combination of the habits you’ve built over a lifetime and the inner feelings you have about yourself, both of which play on each other and create never-ending loops in your behavior.
But a conscious effort over time can get you the results you want. Here are some things you can do to make building leadership a priority in your life.
1. Look a Little Closer
The first thing I want you to do is to put your ideas of leadership in check because a lot of us have some mixed up notions of what creates a leader. Perhaps you’ve envied and even resented men with natural leadership skills in the past, and for this reason have developed negative connotations in your mind about what this actually means.
To confront this issue, put any hard feelings you have towards overwhelmingly charismatic people in the back of your mind for a minute and just observe them at play. Watch the tactics they use, often unconsciously, to gain the group’s approval as well as get what they want out of life.
In the past, you may have seen them as bossy, pushy, or manipulative, but often just by watching a little closer and putting our grievances away we realize that we had a blurry view of things.
So some revelations may be in store for you. Continue observing people with strong leadership skills as you progress with your social skills – studying how human interaction works in practice rather than theory is a crucial key to mastering this stuff.
2. Fill Your Time
One of the main reasons men have trouble gaining respect from their social circle is because they are too needy. How does this apply to leadership? It’s hard to be looked up to if you’re constantly pining for people to be your friend or show you attention. You should add to the group not take from it.
So a great cure for neediness is to simply fill your life with obligations and interests. Set goals and spend time pursuing them. Take up cool new hobbies – especially hobbies that might make you more interesting to women. Go to the gym a few days a week and have different social groups you can hang out with so you’re not always relying on one to keep you entertained.
As you fill your time with all this stuff to do, you won’t need others to be around you so much, and the difference in the vibe you put out will be huge.
3. Throw a Party
As you develop better leadership skills and observe what other people are doing, one thing you’ll notice is that most leaders aren’t just pushing people to do what they want to do. Rather, they are creating exciting situations in their lives and inviting others to come join in the fun.
Sure, you can build leadership skills slowly by simply calling people up from time to time and trying to get them to do something, but a much better way to practice is to put together a decent party.
It doesn’t have to be huge, and whether you host it at home or out at a nice restaurant, with drinks at the club to follow, is completely up to you. Make it an interesting party, and invite the more interesting people you know.
I highly suggest planning a get-together at least once a month so you’re always keeping it in your mind that practice is needed. If you enjoy pulling things together and really find your footing you might end up putting these things together quite a bit more often.
5. Talk to Everyone
Another great way to practice your leadership skills is to just go up and talk to people, men and women, everywhere you go – this will also go a long way towards building your approach skills.
You may have noticed that in most situations people just seem to hide in their shells.
Imagine you’re sitting in an empty bar and a couple stools away sits some guy you’ve never seen before. The TV is on, but it’s not interesting. Yet, you both just sit there staring at it, never saying a word to each other.
And there’s this awkward vibe in the air, as if you both feel something should be said but neither bothers. Ever experience anything like that before?
People do this sort of thing all the time. And you’ll often find that as soon as you turn and say something to the guy, even if he looked unfriendly, he usually will light up and in within minutes you’re getting to know someone.
This is not only great for learning how to break the ice with people, as mentioned before, but it’s also a way to work on being a leader. You took the initiative by speaking up to that person. You opened up a door to them and pushed them into an interaction they either didn’t have the guts, drive, or confidence to initiate themselves.
It seems small, but if you keep doing this, your leadership skills will grow in leaps and bounds.
And women love a leader – they always have because it’s in their nature. They don’t want the guy who straggles behind the pack, with no ambition to keep up. They want the go-getter. The guy that creates excitement out of the ordinary and interacts with the group, somehow ending up in a position of power without forcing it or being obvious.
That’s game.
A great way to fill your life with obligations and interests, to set goals and spend time pursuing them, and to take up a cool new hobby that will make you more interesting to women, is to join our VIP Membership program.
As you fill your time with the video lessons, the ebook guides, the challenges, exercises and practice sessions you need to keep up with your membership, you won’t need others to help you create the life you want so much. You’ll be doing more of that for yourself as a matter of course. The longer you maintain your membership the more skilled and adept you’ll become.
Take a look right now at how much is available for you, and how many tools you’ll get that you can use on your own inside the VIP Members area. The difference in the vibe you put out will be huge.
